55 High Thoughts To Amaze Any Experienced Stoner

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While we can’t get enough of the disconnect from reality that THC brings to the table or the medicinal properties of CBD, one of our favorite parts of the marijuana experience is the high thoughts that pop into our heads during a particularly entertaining smoke sesh.

Not sure whether you’ve had the privilege of your own stellar musings? Trust us, you’ll know when it happens.

To tide you over, keep you entertained, and help you identify when inspiration arrives, we’ve collected some of our favorite high thoughts of all time.

Enjoy!

What Are High Thoughts?

Neon light decoration of Alice and Wonderland character and his high thoughts

One of the many wonderful features of marijuana is its ability to take your brain places it’s never been before — not literally, of course, but you get the picture.

With only one or two puffs, your thoughts become more flexible and more creative. That’s when high thoughts start to occur.

High thoughts are ideas that provide a different perspective on the mundane facts and activities of regular life.

How do you know if you’ve had a high thought of your own? You can recognize it by the emotional reaction you have.

If you say, “Whoa!”, “Hmmm,” or “Far out!”, congrats and welcome to the club — your notions have reached the next level.

Write them down, send them in, and maybe next time they’ll be on this list.

High Thoughts That Will Break Your Brain

Neon sign that says "It's All In Your Head"

1) It’s Waiters All The Way Down

While you wait for the waiter, at that moment, are you not also the waiter?

2) Interesting But Also Kind Of Sad

There was a moment when you were younger when your mom or dad put you down and never picked you up again.

3) That’s Deep…And Makes A Lot Of Sense

What if people who have anxiety are just unaccustomed to the way the world works because this is the first time they’ve lived through it?

That would mean that confident people feel more at ease because they’ve already lived through at least one life on this planet.

4) You Can Argue This One Until The Cows Come Home

Does a straw have one hole or two?

5) Think About It

How can your brain and body replicate the feeling of falling from a high place in your dreams if you’ve never actually experienced that before?

6) Semantics

How is it possible that being “up for it” and “down for it” mean the same thing?

7) Make It Stop

When you buy a bigger bed, you have more bed room but less bedroom.

8) Words Are Hard

Is there a synonym for synonym?

9) Milk Those High Thoughts

It’s kind of messed up that humans drink the milk of other animals. You don’t see a rhino sucking on a zebra for milk, do you?

10) We Always Knew Boomerangs Were Magic

Neon sign saying "Simply A Misunderstood Genius"

Everything is a boomerang if you throw it up.

11) Ghosts Are Real

When you feel a bug crawling on you but there isn’t actually one there, it’s the ghost of a bug you killed, come back to torment you.

Sleep tight.

12) We’ve Always Wondered That, Too

Why is there a D when you write “fridge,” but not when you write “refrigerator”?

13) Mind Blown

When you say “scent,” is the S or the C silent?

14) Fair Or Unfair?

If life is unfair to everyone, does that mean it’s actually fair?

15) Not Not A Failure

If you try to fail but end up succeeding, which did you actually do?

16) We’ll Make An Exception

If money is the root of all evil, why do they ask for it in church?

17) A Classic

Hyde: “There is no gas shortage, man. It’s all fake. The oil companies control everything. Like, there’s this guy who invented this car that runs on water, man. It’s got a fiberglass, air-cooled engine, and it runs on water!”

Fez: “So it’s a boat!”

Hyde: “No, it’s a car. Only you put water in the gas tank instead of gas. And it runs on water, man!”

18) Regardless, It Still Hurts

Nothing is ever really on fire because fire is actually on things.

19) What’s It Called?

Technically, the brain named itself.

20) More Bed Stuff

Red Light District Neon Sign

The word “bed” looks like a bed.

21) Pet-Related High Thoughts

Do pets name their owners?

22) It’s All Relative

Right now, you are both the oldest you have ever been and the youngest you will ever be.

23) Somebody Got Confused

Why do we park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?

24) Keep Going

Two wrongs don’t make a right, but three lefts do.

25) First Time Through

What if a phobia you have is how you died in a past life. If you don’t have any phobias, does that mean this is your first life?

26) Good One

Is it called night because there is no light?

27) Stairs Are Another Dimension

You can never stand backward on stairs.

28) A Glitch In The Matrix

If the multiverse theory is true, is there a universe in which it isn’t?

29) This One Gave Us A Headache

What would happen if Pinocchio said his nose was going to grow?

30) How Long Can This Go On

What if dogs play fetch just because they think you enjoy throwing things and want to make you happy?

31) Mostly Human

If humans are mostly water, does that mean the earth is mostly human?

32) Whoa!

“I’m sorry,” and, “I apologize,” have the exact same meaning unless you’re at a funeral.

33) The Road Less Traveled

If Dora is an explorer, why does she only visit mapped areas?

34) Hmmm

If you replace the W with a T in the words what, where, and when, you have your answer.

35) So True

High Thoughts Neon Sign Saying "I'm as high as a Chimney"

History class is only going to get longer and more difficult.

36) Space Cake High Thoughts

Lasagna is spaghetti-flavored cake.

37) Yeah, What Gives?

If babies are in the womb for nine months, why aren’t they considered nine months old when they’re born?

38) Nice Package

Why is it that ships carry cargo and cars carry shipments?

39) Hah!

Clapping is repeatedly hitting yourself because you like something.

40) Boooooooo

The person who proofread Hitler’s speeches was a grammar Nazi…literally.

41) Ninjas Everywhere

What if every country has ninjas but we only know about Japan’s ninjas because they’re so bad at being ninjas? How many times can we write ninjas in one sentence?

42) That’s A Lot Of Citrus

Are oranges named oranges because they’re orange? Or, is orange called orange because oranges are orange?

43) The Last One

Throw a rock into a lake and you could be the last person to touch that rock until the end of time.

44) Mental Gymnastics High Thoughts

The word “nun” is just the letter N doing a cartwheel.

45) How The Heck Does That Work?

Cells multiply by dividing.

46) Hey, Y’all, Watch This!

Are bugs born knowing they can walk up walls, or do they just accidentally do it one day and go, “Check me out!”

47) Grunt If You Understand

When you ask for someone’s name, you’re essentially asking them what noise you should make to get their attention.

48) Your Dog’s Probably Right

If you’re high enough to think your dog thinks you smoke too much, your dog’s probably right.

49) Tasty Explosions

Popcorn is explosions frozen in time that you can eat.

50) How Young?

Neon sign

You are younger right now than you are right now.

51) It’s All In The Edit

I got so high last night that I didn’t need glasses anymore!

Edit: I think I may have been wearing my glasses the whole time.

52) High Thoughts Business Idea

Open a dispensary named IDEALCANNABIS. People will either read, “I DEAL CANNABIS,” or, “IDEAL CANNABIS.”

Either way, you’re golden.

53) An Apt Description

We should change the name of testicles to “underies.” That way, the two main reproductive organs will be ovaries and underies.

The names describe the location. Win-win, baby!

54) Ewww!

Birthday sex is having sex to celebrate your parents having sex.

55) Super High

You know you’re super high when you’re smoking alone, suddenly realize you’re holding the joint way too long, and try to pass it to the next person.

Read more by clicking here.

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